Was ist ein backhanded compliment? (2023)

FAQs

What is a backhanded answer? ›

adjective [ADJ n] A backhanded compliment is a remark which seems to be an insult but could also be understood as a compliment. A backhanded compliment is also a remark which seems to be a compliment but could also be understood as an insult.

Backhanded compliment examples

These kinds of remarks double as microaggressions. It often sounds like: “You're just so put-together … and so well-spoken, too!” Ultimately, if someone's compliment makes you feel bad about yourself or questions their intent, then it's most likely a backhanded compliment.

Be clear and direct with your response. Do not stoop to hurling an insult back. Defend yourself if there's anything to defend, own up to any mistakes if there are any to own up to, and make it clear you do not tolerate being spoken to with derision. For example: “I'm sorry you don't like the work I produced.

These tactics seek to extract gratitude or submission. Backhanded compliments may be given just for the joy of the sting. If backhanded compliments contain an element of aggression, they raise questions about the necessity and adequacy of apologies.

Backhanded compliments oftentimes are the intersection of passive aggression and jealousy. Sometimes known as “non-compliments” or “disguised insults” these statements are actually subtle insults intended to ultimately put down the person being addressed, without seeming directly mean spirited.

Saying “I'm really impressed you've held a job for 6 months” is likely just an attempt to reaffirm that you think someone is a real flake. Don't cloak your contempt in compliments; if you have something to say, say it. Or don't say anything at all.

What is the psychology behind compliments? ›

Research shows that compliments often make the receivers feel better than most people anticipate. Compliments also improve the mood of the compliment giver. People may want to explore becoming more generous in complimenting others.

In today's society, toxic praise is everywhere, but we don't always recognize it as such. "Toxic praise" comes from the use of praise as a function of manipulation, that is, it is used in order to either reinforce or mute certain outcomes in another, in order to gain a desired outcome.

React to rudeness with kindness.

One of the best ways to defuse rude and negative behavior is to stay friendly and positive. This gives the other person a chance to calm down and adjust their behavior to match yours. Kindness can be a wonderful antidote to rudeness.

Narcissists are always looking for ways to make themselves feel superior to others, and one way they do this is through backhanded compliments. They will use language carefully so that what they are saying sounds positive at first but is then turned into an insult.

Narcissists crave praise but view it as scarce. As a result, they are unlikely to praise others freely or completely.

What is an example of a backhanded insult? ›

“You Look So Great In That Photo. I Can't Even See Your Acne!” Why it's backhanded: The nice compliment is immediately weighed down by the acne comment. They're basically saying you typically have a flaw, but in this photo, you only look great because that flaw is removed.

Sarcasm is the most obvious form of passive aggression, and possibly the most hurtful. Your audience may have no idea that you're upset, much less why you're upset. You're just dumping your feelings on them with little context.

People with covert narcissism often use several tactics to gain control over others in a relationship. This includes gaslighting, manipulation, passive-aggressive behavior, and intimidation.

Signs of Passive-Aggressive Behavior in Narcissists

Indirect hostility (backhanded compliments) Silent treatment to purposely cause discomfort. Purposeful lack of communication. Sulking.

They discovered that backhanded compliments don't do what flatterers typically intend them do – and they probably make the situation worse.

Because of this discomfort, people develop a number of deflection strategies for compliments. One is to deny the thing they have been complimented for (“No, I'm not really that great a writer.”). A second is to minimize the achievement they have been complimented for (“Honestly, it wasn't that big a task.”).

Here are some examples of when so-called compliments could be considered sexual harassment in the workplace: “Jokes” about the way someone looks, their gender identity, or their sexuality. Comments on someone's body. Comments on someone's gender or sexual orientation. Sexual advances that are clearly unwanted.

/ˌbækˈhæn.dɪd/ A backhanded remark seems pleasant but may really be a criticism or mean something unkind: a backhanded compliment. SMART Vocabulary: related words and phrases.

As opposed to real praise, flattery is insincere and almost always has an ulterior motive. The Old English root word of flatter is flater, which originally meant "to stroke with the hand or caress." When you stroke someone's ego to get what you want, you're using flattery.

It's absolutely clear what Oscar Wilde meant (so many forget the second half of the quote) when he wrote “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness.”

What are the top 5 compliments? ›

Praise isn't always bad, but it can become manipulative when it has an ulterior motive to influence student behavior versus expressing genuine heartfelt feelings. Manipulative praise can hinder a learner's ability to reach their fullest potential.

Praise activates the striatum, one of the reward areas in the brain. Researchers believe that, by activating this area, praise improves learning that occurs during sleep, a process referred to as 'skill consolidation'. In other words: by giving others compliments, we help them to learn and to perform better.

Battle says people tend to find small ways to compliment someone they're interested in. So if a guy keeps genuinely complimenting everything from your eyes to your creative endeavors, that could be a sign they're really into you.

us/ˌbæk.hæn.dɪd ˈkɑːm.plə.mənt/ uk/ˌbæk.hæn.dɪd ˈkɒm.plɪ.mənt/ (US also left-handed compliment) a remark that seems to say something pleasant about a person but could also be an insult: I say this unironically, and not as a backhanded compliment. She was insulted by his back-handed compliment.

Awkward compliments can come in all shapes and sizes. Some are those that are misconstrued, such as saying "The way you play the piano doesn't even compare to my ability," when you actually mean that the other person is much better than you.

Rejecting a compliment is just plain rude

The person who complimented you was being genuine, and questioning that comes off as rude. If someone disagrees with my compliment, I feel like I'm being slighted – it feels as if my opinion doesn't matter to the person I was complimenting.

“People have trouble accepting compliments for a number of reasons. Sometimes, it's tied to social anxiety. It can also be caused by feelings of low self-esteem, or by going through life without experiencing positive feelings of gratitude,” explains Lisa Schuman, a New York–based social worker.

Is it okay to not accept compliments? ›

Trouble accepting a compliment could be a symptom of an underlying problem. Tackle your self-esteem issues or address your core beliefs, and you might find that compliments become more comfortable. Even if you feel awkward about accepting a compliment, your behavior doesn't have to become awkward.

These tactics seek to extract gratitude or submission. Backhanded compliments may be given just for the joy of the sting. If backhanded compliments contain an element of aggression, they raise questions about the necessity and adequacy of apologies.

Negging can be considered a form of gaslighting because it involves manipulating someone's emotions or reality in order to gain power and control. Gaslighting, though, usually involves more overt forms of manipulation that are meant to make the victim doubt their own thoughts, memories, or perception.